Posts Tagged ‘Flight Attendant’
Orange Juice Terrorist
Terror strikes the skies again! The sinister culprit of this terroristic plot: John Reid. The name sends shivers down your spine it is so diabolic. For those of you weak of heart, you may not want to continue reading. The following are the alleged acts of Mr. Reid’s fateful flight on American Airlines that day.
An ordinary looking man, one Mr. John Reid, boards his flight and takes a seat with the other first class passengers. He blends in perfectly; no one on board would assume the hot irrational behavior housed in his demented mind by just looking at him. After a quiet take off (too quiet) things are put into motion.
Mr. Reid begins struggling with his tray table, the nerves of what he is about to do begins to show transparent, as he wrestles with the simple device. It is obvious he is a mess and his state of mind is to blame, since no piece of airline equipment is ever faulty, raggedy, or non-functional. After he finally has his tray table into position is demeanor quickly resumes to that of calm, cool, and calculating as he waits for his moment.
The Flight Attendant and hero of this sickening tale is Helen. Helen came over to serve breakfast to the passengers as is customary but, as she did so she could tell right away that something was amiss with John Reid . . . something didn’t “feel” right. In an attempt to show him that she was “on” to him and whatever he was up to, she dropped his breakfast tray hard onto the tray table. Unnerved by the act and knowing he had to act now, he sprung his designs into action. He asked if he could have a glass of orange juice! ORANGE JUICE only the most dangerous of the dangerous terrorists would ask for this evil drink with a First Class breakfast.
“This must be your first time in first class,” she allegedly said. Perhaps she could still stop him and gain the upper hand with this retort. It worked, dumbfounded by her cunning Mr. Reid could only stammer out some reply as to the effect that she was being “very condescending.” As her adrenaline began to pump she reacted quickly attempting to rally support from the other passengers.
She found no support and became panicked, the realization sunk in that this was far larger a plot than she had originally surmised. The whole first class cabin, and perhaps many more must be a part of this Orange Juice Terrorist Cell. Again not to be defeated, Helen put her training to use and went to the captain of the flight and got a written letter stating Mr. Reid may have violated federal law for “threatening, intimidating, or interfering with a crew member.” The day was saved and the actions of this heroic flight attendant are under investigation by the airline.
Okay, like I said these are the alleged incidents of that day. What is actually known is that Mr. Reid, who we are pretty sure is no terrorist, did have some problems with his tray table and did ask for a glass of orange juice. The flight attendant made a snarky remark and there was a verbal exchange between the two. The flight attendant attempted to get passengers to corroborate her version of events, which none would.
She did get a letter from the captain stating that Mr. Reid was possibly “threatening, intimidating, or interfering with a crew member.” and that he could face federal charges. Upon landing the passengers in first class all took time to back up Mr. Reid’s version of events. He has since then received and apology from American Airlines, as have the other passengers who witnessed the event.
Whether the Flight Attendant was just having a bad day, or was not very suited for a position dealing with customers face to face, is up for speculation. The fact that you can be threatened for committing acts of terrorism by asking for a glass of orange juice is ridiculous. Can’t wait for the made for TV movie adaptation of these events. If you are making one let me know I have great script for you (see above). That’s all for today folks . . . I think I’ll go have a glass of apple juice now. Yes, nice un-terroristic good old safe apple juice.
Tags: airline, american airlines, captain, first class, first class passengers, flight, Flight Attendant, Helen, John Reid, Orange Juice, passengers, skies, Terror, Terrorist, tray table